Sep 7, 2011

Overheard online

Girl X to Guy Y during one of 'those' discussions - "If I ever have to commit suicide, I'll jump from your ego level to your IQ level."

Sep 4, 2011

the diary of a single girl # 2

"Its not the man I am missing.... perhaps the sex. "

Sep 3, 2011

the new. the old.

new city, new friends, new job, new life, new dreams. new me.
old memories, old pictures, old songs, old friends, old scars. still me.

Aug 27, 2011

That perfect guy....

"Maybe someday I will find the guy for who I will feel like giving it all up. And that guy won't even have to ask me, because if he does, then he's not that guy. Does that make sense to you?" - The Diary of a Single Girl

Aug 17, 2011

creativity in chaos

Going through a long period of what is commonly called 'the writer's block', I have recently resurfaced on the beloved blog. While I am glad that I made it out of that dark corner, I kept trying to analyse it to figure out what went wrong. Part of that process was to find inspiration in my own work, calling for a thorough re-read of each post since I started 'the Sushi Bar' in 2007.

Then it suddenly came to me.... there is a strong positive correlation of the quality of the written piece with the frame of mind/phase of life I am in. If a graph had to represent these, then the flying peaks of happiness and deepest troughs of depression seemed to inspire the most beautiful work out of me.

What an irony. Here I am with my larger aim in life hovering around seeking stability and peace in life , hoping to balance these ac-dc phases of emotional turmoil and reach a 'zen' state of constant calm. Does that mean that I have to give up the deep spurts of creativity that emerge from these intense periods in my life?

Will I become boring and lose the edge if I attain 'zen'?

Aug 14, 2011

life lesson #1

no matter how much you lose, you can still find enough in you to go on.

Aug 10, 2011

the plus side

the lesser-known positives of drunk dialing:

you wont be complaining about the hangover the next morning.. now you have bigger problems to worry about.
alcohol is known to grow balls on otherwise meek human beings. Well, atleast you are sure you have them now that you have had the courage to make the call and speak the absolute truth, no matter how much shit it gets you into.
it beats the hell out of puking your frustration out or making out with a random person.
if the drunk diallee still answers your call in the morning, you know he/she still cares for you.
the awkward apology the next day and the relief at the forgiveness that's thrown at you.

oh and you sleep better and not just tonight, because your heart is lighter.

Jul 28, 2011

Lost. And found.

Day was thunder, night was storm

A wounded soul and a heart; torn

Jostling with questions,

Haunted by answers

Lost in confusion.

A stroke of luck

Destiny played its turn

You walked into my life. Again.

But this time, I noticed.

Lost in you.

The surreal rescue;

From that web of shadowy thoughts

From the dark waterfall of gloom

You set me free

Lost in hope.

Walking aimlessly on the street, I smiled again.

Smelling contentment in freshly baked bread

Hearing joy in shrieking children

Watching life play hide and seek around me

Lost. And found.

PS. Thank you. You know who you are.

Jul 10, 2011

Confucious says...

I sing along as iTunes plays for me one sweet memory after another.

Jul 7, 2011

It's funny how in spain...

its a dog's world in Espana. They dress up their dogs... like they dress up their babies.. and flaunt them all over the place... lol... designer sweaters, barrettes, little pigtails.. its cute!

the beautician who waxed my eyebrows... didn't believe it was important to wax her hands? And what takes five minutes in India and involves some basic skills, took half an hour, a whole of wax and then an extremely painful process and cost about ten times what it costs in India.

everything is compact... the flats, the roads, the dogs, the coffee cups, the cars, the washing machines, the television sets, the bars, everything except things I need to be compact for my three month trip - like detergent, jam and dish-washing liquid containers... those they made me buy in bulk!!

they talk at the bar, on the street, at the salon, on the bus, at the coffee place, in the club, on the beach, at the grocery store, on the metro.. anywhere and everywhere.. the Spanish love to talk. And I loved listening to their beautiful, animated chatter that was always full of life.

coffee is the end all and be all of Spanish existence. they drink it all day long, before, in between and after any meal during the day. The coffee menu is flourishing with options for varied, experienced tastes.

they like it slow and sensual. Why rush through the motions when you can stop every moment in time and make a 'fiesta' i.e. celebration out of it. In Spain, they serve your coffee slow so they can chat up with you, they make you wait longer in lines at the bank so you can get to know the person before and after you and the 'donoot' lady will tell you stories of her morning travel so you can enjoy ten seconds of smelling those freshly-baked sweet nothings before you start your day. While the world can accuse the Spanish of being lazy, I accuse them of being pleasure seekers rather than efficiency-obsessed.

food is an occasion in Espana.. they celebrate, bond, laugh, cry, share, ideate and connect over a meal. No wonder I love the place so much. My passion is the country's passion. Lunch is not to be taken lightly. Its a two-hour soiree complete with a beverage (most often alcohol), an appetizer, a main course and dessert. How do you go back to work after that, I don't know. What is the Spanish word for 'courage' again?

Speaking of 'courage', Barcelona is one of the craziest party destinations in the world and now I know why. After intermittent drinking through the day, serious alcohol intake starts up in the evening and multiple bar-hopping adventures ensue. Post that, people walk into clubs at 2 Am and party like rockstars into the morning. Breakfast, coffee and then work? Critics can blame the state of the country's economy on this phenomena if they like. I wouldn't though, I think partying is the fuel to their high performance on the happiness index.

For a person who has been a nomad all her life, I finally belong. I belong to Barcelona. Barcelona belongs to me. Te Amo Espana. and its funny how much :)


you might be wondering why I am posting old pieces on my blog now? Well, they were sitting as drafts for months, even years. I guess I just sat on them, hoping that I will come back and make them better.. somehow perfect. But, closure is most important today. done.

Confucious says...

If only time would stand still, I would dance my life away!

Jun 14, 2011

that last kiss.

Never again, am I going to feel that tingly, warm graze of his slight beard on my cheeks. Never again, are those familiar brown eyes going to stare longingly into mine as I search for my eternity in them. Never again, will the same set of lips ever lock to create that 60 second hurricane of world-changing, soul-stirring intercourse of love and lust between two individuals. Never again, will I have my last kiss with him again, cos this is it.

You know what is a real tragedy.. when you know that a kiss is the last.

When you know its the last ... the mind is wheeling in so many directions. Flashing between the past, the present and the future of how you got to this moment where you are parting ways with some one who is obviously important in some way, you are unsure of how to remember this. Is it him, is it me, is it both of us, is the world that wouldn't let us be together..... Would the questions just stop for minute and let this sweet moment of surrender to my lust be the answer to my angst. Would the pain part ways with me to let pleasure play its part for this might be my last kiss with him?

You know what is an even bigger tragedy.... when you don't realize that a kiss is the last.

I do that routine two-second peck on the lips just before I leave for the escalator to catch my flight, smile, say our good byes and leave. And as I walk away slowly, fixing my laptop bag strap on my shoulder and check for my boarding pass and turn around to glance back at him, without for a second thinking that this might be the end of it all.

If I knew that this was my last kiss, would I play it differently? Oh what I would give, to rewind to that moment in time. To relive it, and really savor it .... to find a way to somehow make those few seconds last forever. And now the million dollar question: What is the perfect last kiss? Everything just freezes around you , and the only noise around you is two faint heart beats thumping in a confused synchrony. While the voice in your head screams at the top of its lungs in ecstasy, and your lips are shamelessly confessing the same... somehow you can't utter the words ... even to each other.... in the fear that this will all get jinxed and just disappear...

which it did anyway, despite all the precautions I took! :(

So this is an ode to the last kiss, the mother of all kisses... because there isn't going to be another one like this one.

May 15, 2011

that first kiss

Why is there always this big fuss about the first kiss. Aren't you sort of fumbling anyway? And why do we hang the albatross of the success of the future relationship around our necks based on how great that first kiss is?

"Oh.. that's a little too much tongue... this guys is probably too aggressive, or maybe he is a pervert .... no way I wanna date someone like that. "

" God he is hardly opening his mouth, what a wuss.... I cant date such a meek fellow who is too scared to face a kiss head on, I mean what he is going to with larger challenges in life"

Really... all that .. from a kiss?

What is a perfect kiss anyway? Is it technique, the person or the hope that those closed eyes will unveil the dreams of the next five ten years with the ones we've locked lips with? In my opinion, all the expectations we have are what sets it up for failure. whether its a kiss or the relationship.

And we shouldn't make a big deal about a first kiss because its exactly that... the FIRST kiss. Doesn't that logically mean that we have so many more kisses to build a connection with this person i.e. chances to work on things and be mature about giving some one a real shot at being your partner.

I'll tell you where to shift the spotlight to. Wait for the next post, por favor !

Mar 15, 2011

true dat.

"people who are the hardest to love are the ones who need it the most" ...

Mar 3, 2011

Te amo España...

you made me laugh again. you made me want to break into a dance in the middle of the street. you made me feel wonder. you made me feel alive again. you are my favorite place in the world right now.

Jan 18, 2011

Eminem to the rescue...

Guess who's back...
back again
Sue is back
tell a friend !


I know its been a year... but I have a valid excuse. I was getting an education.